Dress Code for Primal Erotic Parties

The energy of an erotic party is much better when everyone follows a dress code. You may arrive in ordinary street clothes, but after completing the door formalities, you must immediately change to comply with the dress code below.

A limited supply of lockers is provided at no charge. Do not bring valuables. Cell phones not encouraged, are not permitted past the lockers, and may not be used inside the building. Your only expenses are the door fee ($20), so you don't need to bring extra money. When there's a live performer, you might want some cash to buy CDs and swag. There's a snack vending machine, but Primal provides a nice snack buffet.

Primal Dress Code:

At Primal, we have a strict No Street Clothes policy. Also a strict Respect policy.

Permitted attire includes:

• party theme (changes each event) (details in each party announcement);
• nudity;
• encouraged materials: leather, lace, silk, velvet, rubber, latex, PVC, faux fur;
• cross-dressing;
• fetishwear, corset, waist cincher;
• bare feet, fetish footwear;
• lingerie, underwear, sheer, gauze, transparent;
• sarong, kilt, stylish robe;
• certain historic formalwear;
• attire regarded as transgressive by the vanilla world.

• ordinary street wear, jeans;
• ordinary work clothes, dress shirt, slacks;
• sweatshirts, sportswear, hoodies;
• vanilla logowear (teams, slogans, polo, etc) (some kinky slogan T-shirts might be approved);
• ordinary uniforms and jackets;
• culturally confrontational items such as nazi uniforms.

We follow one traditional exception. Trans and Intersex folk can wear whatever they like. For this purpose, we define trans liberally, as anyone who has lived in more than one gender, or who is cross dressing tonight.

Ordained members of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are of course permitted to be in habit. Or not mainfest, as the spirit guides them.

Everyone must comply with the dress code, either on arrival, or immediately after entering. Some people get naked immediately, others change into party-wear. Remember to bring a bag for your street clothes.

Depricated (undesirable) attire includes the following. We don't get much of this, so it would stand out.

• "shirtcocking": A few guys show up in dress clothes, take their trousers off, and walk around all night wearing a dress shirt with the shirt tails hanging around their crotch. Looks pretty sleazy. Does anyone actually think this is attractive, or fits with this or any other dress code?
  If you just want to wear only a top, choose a tight sleeveless tee, without shirttails. That can be hot.
• "towel boy": Wearing just a towel, wrapped around the waist. Now, for some gay/bi men, this can be hot - reminiscent of bathhouses. And that's good. But for some attendees, it reminds them of the pitiable desperate straight guys at a local het sex club.
  If you want to wrap something around your waist, may we suggest a sarong, or a kilt, or a skirt.
  It's OK to bring a towel to sit/lie on.

All garb must be worn with respect.

• Primal is one of the most sexually, culturally, ethnically and racially diverse events. Our attendees do not welcome ridicule or disrespect of anyone. If you choose to celebrate someone, we require that you do it with knowledge, love, and respect. This is obvious to our regulars, and we haven't had a problem.
• Example: if you emulate an ancient Roman, we assume you'll study up on them, rather than just do a costume shop parody. More importantly, you'd celebrate the culture rather than ridicule it.
• Example: some themes suggest depictions of courtesans. Many attendees of Primal have done sex work (though never at Primal). We are well aware of the mixed realities of that profession. Choose fantasy, not mockery or judgmentalism.
• Everyone needs to be especially sensitive around more contemporary and American identities. This country still has tremendous problems and pain around race.
• When Primal mentions different subcultures, it's to make them visible. Mainstream media and history hide subcultures. Let's move beyond stereotypes and invisibility.
• If any costume is considered disrespectful, you'll be required to change.
• This policy also applies to identities that are currently fashionable targets in SF - straights, aging male Caucasians, monogamous people, bald people, people of size, religious people, etc. Any stereotyping or disrespect perpetuates negative energy.
• This policy does not mean that we all walk around as stiffs. Quite the contrary. There are lots of ways to have fun, without its being at anyone's expense.

You can also see our past dress themes.